Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Power of positive thinking

Today is a holiday in the U.S. and a time when family and friends get together, typically around food and alcohol.  I wasn't with my family today and people I would have hung out with were with their own families, so I was alone. It made me think about my ex, Mr. What's His Name.  I miss being in a relationship, but not one in which I am with someone that treats me less than I deserve.  On days like this, though, I miss it more than normal.  In my days before going on the program, I would have used food to avoid uncomfy feelings, like feeling lonely.  Not today.  In fact, I didn't even have a desire for food, even though the fourth of July is about hamburgers, ribs and hot dogs by a barbecue.  Instead, as feelings come up, I need to deal with them.

One of the things I have been doing is really trying my best to incorporate positive things into my life as I continue on my weight loss journey.  There will come a day when regular food re-enters my life and I definitely do not want to fall back into old patterns that brought me to 417 pounds in the first place.  I strongly believe in the power of positive thinking.  I remember this old Saturday Night Live skit with Al Franken playing Stuart Smalley.  Do you remember that?  He would look in the mirror and say things like:

"I'm good enough.
I'm smart enough.
And doggone it ... people like me."

Each time I would see it on Saturday Night Live back in the day, I would crack up.  I would think to myself, "Do people actually do that in front of  a mirror with a straight face?"  I couldn't ever imagine that I would do that and be serious because it just seemed really ridiculous.  And while it does take the notion of positive thinking to an extreme, there is some validity there to a certain degree.  I know that when I come from a positive place, even in the face of extreme adversity, it is a much better way to approach life.  I don't need to sit in a mirror and tell myself that I'm good enough or smart enough, but I can combat any negative talk with positive energy.  People who do so have less stress, are healthier and just generally seem happier.  Part of the process of putting weight on over the years involved an extreme amount of negativity about myself and I frankly am unwilling to go down that road any longer.  I'd tell myself that I was ugly, unworthy and deserved it if I found myself alone.  Then, lo and behold, I'd find myself in the food, with no immediate escape possible.  Looking back over my day, I realized that there was none of that negativity with me.  I may have been by myself today, but that was perfectly okay.  I was able to work on boxing up some of my clothes that are too big, watched a movie and even gave myself a pedi.  Best of all, thoughts of food were not even with me.  These are things I need to really appreciate and celebrate more often, especially when I know people who are really struggling with their programs, whether Optifast or other methods of weight loss.  For me, the struggle and the clawing through white knuckle moments are just simply not there.  Instead, I have peace inside.  What a miracle that is for sure!


Anonymous said...

Kathy, I find you truly inspirational. I was searching the web for liquid diet support and information, and came across your blog. I'm so thankful I did. May God continue to Bless you.

Kathy said...

Thank you for the kind words! So glad you were able to find my blog. God bless you as well ;-)

Stephanie O said...

Oh Kathy I wish I would have read this 5 hours ago. Out of the blue tonight my ex called and well I blew my diet. I had been doing so great my first week and then boom! I am so upset with myself right now that once again I allowed him to get the best of me. If only I could be like the kids and not answer the phone to him. I will pick myself up and dust the dirt off and I guess tomorrow is another day and I will get back to drinking my shakes and water but right now I feel so worthless. You are so great and tonight I will reread what you wrote above a hundred times and hope to gain just an ounce of the wisdom you have shared. Thank You.

Kathy said...


I am so sorry that you were feeling sad. I know those feelings can be so overpowering that there is no fight when the idea of having the food feels like it will take it away. You are absolutely right, tomorow is another day. It's an opportunity to let go of today and be a fresh new place. Now your charge is going to be to change those messages that tell you that you are worthless (which, of course, you are NOT!). You deserve to take good care of your health and treat yourself with loving kindness, just as you do for your children. Hugs to you ;-)

Truth Teller said...

Stuart Smalley was so right! I've got to do that inside my head every time I feel 'less than'. Kathy, you ought to be a professional helping people in weight loss. You are so good at raising people up. Adore you!!!!

Melissa said...

Oh yes, I remember Mr. Smalley! And kiddo, we ALL like you! Have a great day! ;)

Kathy said...

You guys are all awesome ;-) Thanks for always being so supportive.

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