On the road again

Tomorrow morning I head out for road trip number two, from San Diego to Vegas.  This time I am in absolutely no danger of being too cold.  It's supposed to 104 degrees while I'm there.  I'm thinking shorts, capris and my fun little bathing suit to wear in the pool (but not too long, don't want to turn into a lobster).  I am looking forward to seeing my brother and the rest of my family that lives out thee.  They haven't seen me since November, so I'm sure they'll be able to tell the difference with my weight loss.  Today was a much better day than yesterday.  It was amazing  but the anger that I was feeling when I put up my last post left me within a few hours.  I didn't want to sit in the feelings, but by forcing the issue and dealing with the feelings I was having, I was able to work through it.  Hmm ... novel little concept. 

I started my morning by going out for some exercise.  Awhile back, I posted about cutting back on my exercising because it was impeding on my weight loss.  Yet, truth be told, it makes me feel very good, so I have decided to not cut back on how many days a week I exercise, but the amount.  So instead of walking 3 miles, I still hit the pavement each day but cut back by a quarter of a mile and that seems to give me what my body, mind and spirit crave but it's just the right amount of exercise.  I have been experiencing some back pain and it seems to really help with that.

I had lunch with a couple of friends today (hi ladies!).  When I say "lunch", I mean they ate, I had a diet Coke.  I was enjoying their company and not at all focusing on their food.  I do look forward to the day when I can incorporate chewable nutrition back into my repertoire, but I am perfectly okay with what I am doing right now with Optifast because, frankly, it is working!  I could have never imagined being okay with not eating.  I mean, good Lord, I have not had any food in five months.  Can you imagine?  Yet, I'm fine with moving forward and continuing on this path.  The way I look at it is that food is not going anywhere and I will be able to have healthy, yummy food in the future when I am ready for it.  It is absolutely the healthiest approach for me because I am not mourning over the loss of the food but understanding that this is absolutely a process and a journey for my life.  I don't need to change a thing because I'm on vacation.  If I start thinking that way, then I'm heading down towards a slippery slope and I would need to be honest with myself about my true intentions.  Deep down, my true intention is to be successful on this program and not another statistic of a person who is repeatedly on the program.  This is such a huge commitment and sacrifice ... I only intend on doing this once.  So I know that my family will be eating my mom's lumpia, chicken adobo, pancet and other Filipino fare ... and I will not.  And I'm not at all sad about it.  Taking good care of myself feels awesome ;-)  Now, I need to pack my suitcase.  Vegas baby!!