Down the disposal and treating me right

I am so thrilled to report that I had a good weekend.  In Southern California, we are experiencing a beautiful start to spring.  I'm so sorry for those that are getting pounded by the horrible weather in other parts.  I've felt a little guilty for our gorgeous weather, although we do pay through the nose to live in it!  Yesterday morning I went for a walk with Sara around the lake that we usually frequent.  Her husband was with us for parts of it as well.  We did three miles and then spent some time chatting.  I noticed the pain in my legs was pretty strong in the morning, but that exercise really helped because by later in the afternoon, it was lessened a little bit.

I ran a ton of errands on Saturday, among them was to go and get some groceries.  As I've shared on here before, after I stopped Optifast, I eventually went over to Weight Watchers.  It wasn't right away, but I knew I still needed and wanted the group support.  So, with the program, everything is done on a points system.  You get so many points you're allotted to eat each day based on your age, height and weight.  Each food has a point value based on the amount of fat, carbs, fiber and protein in it.  I track my food by writing absolutely everything down, even if I have something that was a poor choice.  It helps me stay accountable.  It's actually easy to do since WW has a lot of tools to help with that.  For me, it makes me feel more sane than constantly counting calories, fat grams, carbs, etc.  I do weigh and measure my food, though.  Perhaps there will come a day when I won't need to do that but, for now, it's working for me.  When I was at the store getting groceries, I had a little craving for a food I have been trying to stay away from, ice cream.  If I eat it away from home, I'm fine and can stop after a serving.  But if I bring a half gallon or similar container home of it, I am constantly digging into it.  However, I've been doing really well with my food, wanted it and so I absentmindedly opened the door to the freezer section and grabbed an ice cream container.  I rationalized in my head that I would measure it out like everything else.  Sounds like a recipe for disaster, right?

I got home, put the food away and did some cleaning around the house and gardening in the back.  I didn't think anything about that ice cream until I made dinner and thought it would be nice to have something sweet afterwards.  The serving was a half cup, so I measured it out and went on my merry way.  As I had it, it tasted really rich, almost unappealingly rich.  I went back into the freezer and pulled out the container.  It was in absolute shock when I looked at the label for what turned out to be super premium ice cream.  The first thing I noticed is that each half cup serving had 298 calories.  Are you freaking kidding me??  The carb serving was much more than should be in one serving, especially for a diabetic like me.  So I calculated the points value and this one serving was eight points.  Just to give you perspective, my breakfast usually has less points for the entire meal.  So, I promptly went to my sink, turned on the hot water and dumped it all down the garbage disposal.  In that moment, I realized that I deserve better than putting that crud into my body.  If I want a sweet treat once in a while, WW does make individual servings of desserts but I have absolutely no business bringing in ice cream like that.  Seriously, almost 300 calories for just a half cup just isn't worth it.  I am proud of myself for having enough clarity in that moment to get rid of it, though. 

I started out today in church.  I usually go to a Saturday night contemporary service, but I like going on Sundays for Palm Sunday and Easter.  I was exactly where I needed to be, hearing exactly what I needed to hear.  The message was so clear that God loves me so deeply and never leaves me.  Even when I'm going through rough stuff in my life, He still never leaves me, giving me enough strength to handle the challenges that come before me as well as the joy that I get to feel.  Afterwards, I went out to breakfast with my friend that goes to church with me.  I haven't seen her in about six weeks since she's been out of town so we were catching up.  I was talking to her about my upcoming graduation and she told me it would be her honor to host a get-together afterwards since she lives so close to Cal State.  I have worked really hard to get this degree and it's been a very long road.  I want to celebrate that with friends and family, especially since my dad and stepmother are coming into town for the ceremony.  Besides, not everyone wants to sit through a ceremony but who doesn't love a fun little party! 

I ended my day by going for a workout at the gym, did a 5K on the treadmill, and then did strength training at home.  I had a really great dinner that was very clean, nutritious and even tasty.  Who knew healthy food could taste so yummo?  Living in a healthy way is a great thing for not only my body, but for my whole being.  My blood sugar has been perfectly in range and right now I can honestly say my legs are only mildly painful.  Trust me, that's a big leap from the pain I usually feel in them.  Tomorrow is the appointment with the doctor, so I'll report back on that tomorrow night.  I'm not even feeling nervous about it.  I'm just grateful to be moving forward.